MARRIAGE

Divine institution, established since creation. Through marriage, God prevents humanity from becoming a confused multitude of dispersed individuals; It is thus organized on the basis of the family, of which the cell is the couple, united according to their will.

(a) The purpose of marriage, according to the Bible, is fourfold:

(A) the continuation of the human race (Gen. 1:27-28);

(B) the necessary collaboration. Man is essentially a social being. God said, “It is not good for man to be alone; I will make him a help meet for him” (Gen. 2:18);

(C) the unity of spouses: the woman has been taken from the man (just as the man exists through the woman, 1 Cor. 11:12); abandoning father and mother to found a new home, the two become one flesh (Gen. 2:21-24);

(D) the sanctification of both by preserving what is for them the marital bond (1 Cor. 7:2-9). The Lord wants marriage to be honored by all and holy (Heb. 13:4). He treats as apostates those who, preaching asceticism, allow themselves to prohibit it (1 Tim. 4: 1-3).

(b) Celibacy.
If marriage is in the order of creation, what happens to those who remain single? Some among them do it voluntarily, “for the kingdom of heaven’s sake” (Mt. 19:12), like Paul (1 Cor. 9:5, 15). In effect, the celibate is less involved in the affairs of life and less limited by the desire to please his spouse; He can thus devote himself to a determined service for the Lord without distractions of any kind (1 Cor. 7: 32-35).

This does not mean that celibacy is placed at a higher level on the scale of holiness than marriage. Each one must discern the particular calling and personal gift he has received from the Lord (1 Cor. 7:7).

The cap. 7 of 1 Corinthians is the only passage dedicated to celibacy; It is understood that Paul, fully justifying it, says: “He who gives her in marriage does well, and he who does not give her in marriage does better” (1 Cor. 7:38); he would wish, from his point of view, that all men were like him and that they would be spared much pain (1 Cor. 7:7, 26-31); but he affirms that there is no evil in marriage, but quite the opposite (1 Cor. 7:27, 28, 36, 39).

Each one must seek God’s will individually (1 Cor. 7:7-9). If someone feels called to celibacy, it is because the Lord has given it to them as a gift; His singleness may be richly compensated, as in the case of Paul, with a great spiritual family (1 Cor. 4: 14-15). If someone feels called to marriage, it will be in this state that he will truly glorify God.

(c) Monogamy:
Monogamy is the ideal prescribed by Scripture (Gen. 2:18-24; Mt. 19:5; 1 Cor. 6:16). Only it allows the total unity of the two spouses, while polygamy makes it impossible. The Creator confirms this fact by giving birth to an approximately equal number of males and females.

He also wants marriage to be a permanent relationship (Mt. 19:6). Normally, affection between husband and wife develops over the years. Morality condemns breaking the contract. Because of their obligations, husbands must discipline themselves and raise their children by teaching them to preach good.

Marriage is indissoluble before death, except in cases of adultery (Rom. 7:2, 3; Mt. 19:3-9). Paul notes that there are arbitrary ruptures, comparable to desertion (1 Cor. 7:15). The cases to which the apostle refers were probably accompanied by marital infidelity.

Remarriage of illegitimately divorced persons is prohibited (Mt. 5:32; 19:9; 1 Cor. 7:10, 11). The ruling of a civil court does not annul the marriage before God; declares whether the breakup has been caused by the sin of one of the spouses or both. It appears that Adam, Cain, Noah and their three sons were monogamous.

(d) Polygamy:
Polygamy appeared with Lamech (Gen. 4:19), and thus the purity of marriages was stained, as men allowed themselves to be dominated by carnal impulses in the choice of their partners (Gen. 6:1-2). When Abraham took a second wife to obtain the fulfillment of the promise, he acted foolishly (Gen. 16:4).

Isaac had only one wife, but Jacob was polygamous, in part due to Laban’s deception (Gen. 29). Moses repressed the abuses, but he did not abolish them at once. The Israelites were little spiritually grown, and chained to the uses and customs of the time, which did not correspond at all to the will of God.

The great legislator rendered a great service to the cause of marriage by prohibiting unions between blood relatives and in-laws (Lev. 18); he discouraged polygamy (Lev. 18:18; Deut. 17:17); secured the rights of wives of inferior status (Ex. 21:2-11; Deut. 21:10-17); regulated divorce (Deut. 22:19, 29; 24:1); He demanded respect for the marriage bond (Ex. 20:14, 17; Lev. 20:10; Deut. 22:22).

After Moses, there were still those who took to polygamy: Gideon, Elkanah, Saul, David, Solomon, Rehoboam, and others (Judg. 8:30; 1 Sam. 1:2; 2 Sam. 5:13; 12 :8; 21:8; 1 Kings 11:3). However, Scripture exposes the evils inherent to polygamy, the miserable rivalries that occurred between the wives of Abraham, Jacob, and Elkanah (Gen. 16:6; 30; 1 Sam. 1:6); On the other hand, the beauty of happy families is highlighted (Ps. 128:3; Pr. 5:18; 31:10-29; Eccl. 9:9; cf. Eclos. 26:1-27).

Abraham married his half-sister; Jacob had two wives who were sisters to each other (Gen. 20:12; 29:26). In Egypt, it was not uncommon to marry a sister of one’s father and mother; the Persians allowed it (Herodotus 3:31). Athenians could marry a half-sister of the same father, while Spartans could marry their half-sisters born of the same mother.

The Law of Moses prohibited these unions and even marriages with more distant relatives (Lev. 18:6-18). The marriage status of the Romans was similar to that of the Israelites; It denounced as incest the union of close relatives (for example, between brother and sister) or between in-laws (such as father-in-law and daughter-in-law).

All NT texts speak formally against polygamy. Speaking to the Jews about divorce, Christ stated that Moses had permitted it because of the hardness of their hearts and that, except in cases of unfaithfulness, a remarriage was adultery (Matt. 19:8-9).

It can be concluded that polygamy had been permitted in the OT era for the same reason, although with the indicated restrictions; However, it is clear that it has no place in the Gospel.

The special case of polygamists converted to the Gospel was treated with the acceptance of the de facto family situation; However, the polygamist was excluded from the possibility of holding any position of responsibility in the church (cf. 1 Tim. 3:2, 12; Tit. 1:6).

(e) Concubinage:
Concubinage was a lower form of polygamy. The concubine was a woman of lower rank, perhaps a slave or prisoner of war (Gen. 16:3; 22:24; 36:12; Deut. 21:10-11; Judges 5:30; 2 Sam. 5 :13; etc.). Hagar, p. e.g. she did not have the social position of Sarah (Gal. 4:22, 23), and the children of the concubines, although fully recognized, did not have the same right to inheritance as the children of the main wife (Gal. 4:30; Gen. 25:6).

(f) Levirate.
The levirate (lat. “lege vir”, “husband’s brother”). The Law of Moses prescribed that the widow of a dead brother without children had to be taken as a wife by the surviving brother. The firstborn of the children of this new union was to inherit the property and name of the deceased (Deut. 25:5-6).

The interested party could be freed from this obligation, but in that case he had to endure a public rebuke (Deut. 25: 7-10); the duty to marry could then be transmitted to a more distant relative (cf. Rt. 4:1-10). This sought to maintain the integrity of the family, and prevent the extinction of the race and name of a man who died prematurely or was deprived of offspring.

(g) Subsequent marriages.
Once the marriage bond is broken by death, the surviving spouse is free to marry whomever he or she wants, as long as it is “in the Lord” (1 Cor. 7:39); This means that you must marry a truly believing person, both seeking to glorify God and serve the Lord with their lives.

Paul’s statement about bishops and deacons, that they “be…husbands of one wife” (1 Tim. 3:1, 12), has been interpreted variously. The Greek Orthodox Church, which allows the marriage of the lower ranks of its clergy, prohibits their remarriage.

Hence the proverb in Greece: “Spoiled like a priest’s wife.” However, what seems to be the case in these texts of Paul is to prevent access to positions of authority or responsibility to those who lived in situations of polygamy or concubinage, at a time when the pressures of environmental paganism encouraged these ways of life. .

It is true that for widows to have a role in the early Church it was necessary that she “been the wife of one husband” (1 Tim. 5:9). Having belonged to two families, it would be in this context that she would have to provide her services. However, deacons and bishops had to be husbands of one wife when they began to exercise their functions (see ELDER, DEACON, BISHOP).

(h) Prohibition of certain marriages.
In addition to the provisions dealing with incest (Lev. 18), the law formally prohibited the Israelites from associating with pagans, who would draw them into idolatry and immorality (Ex. 34:15-16; Deut. 7: 3-4). And that is, indeed, what happened every time they disobeyed (Judges 3:6; 1 Kings 11:1-2; Ezra 9:1-2; 10:2-3). In the NT, the text of 2 Cor. 6:14-7:1 also applies to marriage. A child of God, reborn of Him, cannot marry an unsaved person.

There have been many cases in which well-disposed young people, having professed faith in Jesus Christ, have been totally separated from the faith by an unbelieving spouse. And if they have remained personally faithful, they have had to go through multiple personal sufferings, and they have had to see the unpleasant consequences that all this has had for their children. The only security and happiness is in marrying “in the Lord” (1 Cor. 7:39).

(i) Choice of wife and betrothal.
In Israel it was the parents (especially the father) who chose the young man’s wife (Gen. 21:21; 24:38:6); Sometimes the son expressed his preferences, but the father was the one in charge of formalizing the matter (Gen. 34: 4, 8; Judges 14: 1-10). The young man could not deal with it directly except in exceptional circumstances (Gen. 29:18).

The young woman was not always consulted; the will of his father and his older brother decided the matter (Gen. 24:51, 57-58; 34:11). Sometimes a more distant relative sought a husband for her daughter, or offered her to a good match (Ex. 2:21; Josh. 15:17; Rot. 3:1, 2; 1 Sam. 18:27) .

Gifts were given to the future wife’s relatives, and sometimes to herself (Gen. 24:22, 53; 29:18, 27; 34:12; 1 Sam. 18:25). Another young man, called the bridegroom’s friend (Jn. 3:29), served as an intermediary between the two interested parties, but he had no contact, except in this, before the wedding.

It was, as can be seen, a more precise and formal commitment than our modern commitments, and one that already had certain legal consequences. If the betrothed allowed herself to be seduced, she was punished with death for adultery, and so was her accomplice, “because she humiliated her neighbor’s wife” (Deut. 22: 23-24).

Soldiers were excused from fighting if a fiancée was waiting for them at home (Deut. 20:7), in the same way that the newlywed was exempt from military service for one year (Deut. 24:5). This explains why in Mt. 1:18-25 the terms betrothed and husband and wife are used simultaneously about Mary and Joseph before the consummation of their marriage.

(j) Celebration of weddings.
It took place without religious ceremony, with the possible exception of ratification by oath (Prov. 2:17; Ex. 16:8; Mal. 2:14). After the exile a contract was made and sealed (Tob. 7:14). Before the wedding, the bride bathed (cf. Jude 10:3; Eph. 5:26, 27), dressed in white clothes, often adorned with beautiful embroidery (Rev. 19:8; Ps. 45:13). , 14), covered herself with jewels (Is. 61:10; Rev. 21:2), girded her waist with a wedding belt (Is. 3:24; 49:18; Jer. 2:32), and He watched (Gen. 24:65).

The bridegroom, also dressed in his best clothes, and with a crown on his head (Song. 3:11; Is. 61:10), left his house with his friends (Judg. 14:11; Mt. 9:15 ), heading, to the sound of music and songs, to the house of the bride’s parents. If it was a nocturnal procession, there were lamp bearers (1 Mac. 9; 39; Mt. 25:7; cf. Gen. 31:27; Jer. 7:34).

The bride’s parents entrusted her, veiled, to the young man, with her blessings. Friends gave their congratulations (Gen. 24:60; Rt. 4:11; Tob. 7:13). The married man invited everyone to his house, or to his father’s house, in the midst of singing, music and dancing (Ps. 45:15, 16; Song 3: 6-11; 1 Mac. 9:37). Young men accompanied them (Mt. 25:6).

A banquet was served in the house of the husband or her parents (Mt. 22: 1-10; Jn. 2: 1, 9) or in the house of the young woman, if the husband lived far away from her (Mt. 25 : 1). He himself or the bride’s parents did the entertainment (Gen. 29:22; Judges 14:10; Tob. 8:19). The bride appeared for the first time next to the husband (John 3:29).

As night fell, the parents accompanied their daughter to the bridal chamber (Gen. 29:23; Judges 15:1; Tob. 7:16, 17). The husband came accompanied by his friends or the parents of his wife (Tob. 8: 1). The festivals resumed the next day, and lasted one or two weeks (Gen. 29:27; Judges 14:12; Tob. 8:19, 20).

(k) Spiritual sense:
Marriage and espousals often symbolize Jehovah’s spiritual relationships with his people (Is. 62:4, 5; Hos. 2:18). The apostasy of God’s people, due to idolatry and other forms of sin, is compared to the adultery of a wife (Is. 1:21; Jer. 3:1-20; Ezek. 16:24; Hos. 2) , which leads to divorce (Ps. 73:27; Jer. 2:20; Hos. 4:12).

The NT uses the same image: Christ is the husband (Mt. 9:15; John 3:29), the Church is the wife (2 Cor. 11:2; Rev. 19:7; 21:2, 9; 22:17). Christ, head of the Church, loves her and takes care of her sanctification. There is the model presented for Christian marriage (Eph. 5:23-32).